give me toe pain over heart pain any day
Oct. 4th, 2009 02:27 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
unknownfateI was just settling in to bed when a sound came from the dark house outside my room.
It was a scrabbling sound, of claws on wood, as if some undead creature that no longer remembered that there were such things as doorbells wanted very much to tear its way in and eat my brain*. That sound had startled me out of half-sleep fog more than once, so when I heard it wide awake, I was more annoyed than spooked.
I got up and walked out into the dark hall. Hearing me coming, my she-cat trotted out and did her very best to look as if the last thing in the world on her mind was mauling the bathroom doorjam to splinters while people were trying to sleep.
"Nice try," I said. "But you know better." She looked adorable. "Yeah, you."
Then, her brother, who was laying in wait in the packing material in an Uncommon Goods box pounced. I admit it startled me too. Facehuggers have nothing on the boy. He appeared in midair right in front of his sister, who bolted. Right across my bare foot.
I'd have to see it slow motion to be sure, but I'm fairly certain she had every claw on every foot flailing like a panicked blender as she tore across my flesh and into the room behind me. It took about a second and a half and when the smoke cleared. I was still standing there, bleeding from four gashes across my foot, while the boy danced happily. That had worked way better than he planned.
"Was that really necessary?" I asked him, holding up my bleeding foot. He went all wide-eyed and then tore off again to his next exploit, tail all poofed up. I limped to the bathroom for a dousing in alcohol and some carefully arranged band-aids.
True story. And not as painful as the other one about me having to sing with the K4 class and
staff at the double funeral for the two little girls that drowned.
*Hope the zombies never catch on to doorbells. That would probably work a few times.
It was a scrabbling sound, of claws on wood, as if some undead creature that no longer remembered that there were such things as doorbells wanted very much to tear its way in and eat my brain*. That sound had startled me out of half-sleep fog more than once, so when I heard it wide awake, I was more annoyed than spooked.
I got up and walked out into the dark hall. Hearing me coming, my she-cat trotted out and did her very best to look as if the last thing in the world on her mind was mauling the bathroom doorjam to splinters while people were trying to sleep.
"Nice try," I said. "But you know better." She looked adorable. "Yeah, you."
Then, her brother, who was laying in wait in the packing material in an Uncommon Goods box pounced. I admit it startled me too. Facehuggers have nothing on the boy. He appeared in midair right in front of his sister, who bolted. Right across my bare foot.
I'd have to see it slow motion to be sure, but I'm fairly certain she had every claw on every foot flailing like a panicked blender as she tore across my flesh and into the room behind me. It took about a second and a half and when the smoke cleared. I was still standing there, bleeding from four gashes across my foot, while the boy danced happily. That had worked way better than he planned.
"Was that really necessary?" I asked him, holding up my bleeding foot. He went all wide-eyed and then tore off again to his next exploit, tail all poofed up. I limped to the bathroom for a dousing in alcohol and some carefully arranged band-aids.
True story. And not as painful as the other one about me having to sing with the K4 class and
staff at the double funeral for the two little girls that drowned.
*Hope the zombies never catch on to doorbells. That would probably work a few times.
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GOOD KITTY!
Date: 2009-10-04 04:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-10-04 05:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-10-04 05:43 pm (UTC)He only injures me in pursuit of food.