unknownfate: (gunslinger)
[personal profile] unknownfate
Ok. So the Fourth of July in a rural area may not be the best time for sensitive discourse and thoughtful behavior. But.
I was invited to a get-together by some sweet people. They have gone out of their way to be good to me. I know things have been hard on them the past few months and I haven’t been there because I’ve been fighting off my own nervous breakdown. They invited me over for a BBQ and fireworks and I was glad to go.

I ended up part of a volleyball game where a bystander chanted “White Power!” (The fact that I was playing volleyball should tell you that the conversation at the table had gotten too awkward for me. I am not athletic or competitive.) I’m hoping it was a joke, but even if it was it was in poor taste.

Another bystander pretended to have Downs Syndrome to make fun of anyone who flubbed a volley. That went on way too long.

There was also a man who kept switching from stories about people he knew who came to Jesus at his advice, the plot against his life when he was a judge (is he still a judge? I don’t know.), how much money he made a doctor by being in a testimonial for a treatment, and how much he enjoyed punishing people. He was very proud that he once ruined a man’s life for not referring to the flag as respectfully as he wanted. (That’s when I decided volleyball couldn’t be as bad as I remembered from high school gym class and slunk off.)

It was really uncomfortable and I felt bad for not saying what I should’ve said, but I didn’t want to make things any more difficult for the hostess who didn't look happy to be dealing with it anyway. I couldn’t leave since I had promised to see their fireworks they were so proud of. I had to wait until dark at least.

So I decided to be the one to talk to about cute, gentle things. I interrupted conversations to talk about the Old Friends Dog Sanctuary. I talked about my aunt who makes the best banana pudding ever. I made myself obnoxious talking about how I used to live where I could see the Northern Lights and wouldn’t it be cool if we could see St. Elmo’s Fire, but fireflies and fireworks were nice too. I don't know if it helped anybody but me.
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