Apr. 29th, 2017

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Ok, so I signed up for hellofresh with my tax money to see if it turned out to be something I could afford. So far so good, really. There have only been two mishaps. One was some chicken thighs I managed to ruin and the other was a teeny tiny Thai pepper.

The recipe was Shrimp Pad See Ew. Everything was going fine until I got to the pepper. Now, if I've learned nothing else from Alton Brown, I've learned that the smaller the pepper, the hotter it is. So I already had my doubts about this itty bitty wisp of a pepper, but all the other ingredients were mild so I thought maybe I'd just add a little bit. The instructions said to split the skin and scrape out all the seeds. They had all the heat, the instructions said. The rest would just be flavor. Maybe half, I thought. Or a third. That should be plenty.

So, I split the little boonie pepper and scraped out the seeds. It was only difficult because the pepper was so small. But then, a drop of pepper juice splashed on my lip. The pain was instant and fiery. I made the mistake of touching them with my pepper-tainted hands. Long story short, it was on my mouth, cheek, one eye and under my fingernails before I was done and the pain in every one of those places was incredible.

It just isn't a good cooking story unless you're hanging over a sink pouring milk into your eyes. It has now been 24 hours and there is still a burning sensation under my thumbnails. The good news is that the dish came out pretty good. Y'now, once I could use my eye and face again.

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